October 12th, A Year of Non-Monogamomy

After an afternoon movie and a nap at the hotel, Ron, Nora and I headed back to the club for another night of sexcapades.  This night held special meaning for me even as it was likely to be no different than any other night at this club.  It was my one-year anniversary of being non-monogamous. While there was no celebration and Nick and I did not even talk about the occasion, it still resonated strongly with me.  Despite all the ups and downs over the last year, this had been one of the happiest years of my life. This did not in anyway discount momentous events such as marriage and the birth of my children, but overall I was consistently happier during this past year than any other year in my adult life.  I discovered parts of myself that I could only have guessed about previously and found physical pleasures greater than I knew existed.  I was infinitely more content with my very being and had explored facets of myself that I did not know I possessed.  And that was a huge thing to celebrate. So off we went on the first day of my second year in the world of ethical non-monogamy.  It only seemed fitting to spend this night with Ron and Nora since they have accompanied me on this journey from the very first night.

Soon after entering the club we discovered Madeline and Ben in the dining area having dinner.  It was nice to see them, but I was not hungry and there was not room for all of us in the booth, so I left the two couples and wandered around the club checking out the potential for the evening and periodically checked in with the group.

After a while they all migrated upstairs and joined the frisky crowd for what was certainly going to be an interesting evening.  I was leaning into Ron and enjoying his physical proximity and his mildly aroused state when I saw Ben, Madeline and Nora standing together in a frontside to backside row rather closely. Nora and Madeline were being all sexy rubbing up against each other, clothed body full on clothed body, breasts being exposed and openly tweaked.  It was a sexy scene to watch and I knew exactly where this was headed.  Madeline was a sexual sandwich between Ben and Nora just waiting to be devoured.

I excused myself for a visit to the ladies room and when I returned I saw a train line up of Ben, Madeline, Nora and Ron all rubbing and writhing their bodies together.  They were a foursome and clearly headed to a play space.  I lightly grazed my hand along Ron’s back and considered my options.  And uncharacteristically, I opted not to engage and allowed the four of them the space and freedom together as two couples, without my presence.   I deliberately opted not to join as I felt that maybe Ron and certainly Nora would like the space and separation from me.  They went to a nearby playroom near to the upstairs bar and adjacent to the top of the stairs.  Ron graciously invited me to join, but I declined.  I wanted to give them (and especially Nora) a break without me to play because I sensed that I was sometimes a hindrance for Nora. 

While the foursome played - and I assumed literally fucked, (because don’t they always fuck when they are together?), I went off to try my hand at connecting with an attractive couple as an elusive unicorn, an available single woman for all intents and purposes in the moment, at least.  I scoped out a couple that was leaning over the railing watching the sexy dancing below and sipping drinks. Sue was in her late thirties, sported long straight blond hair, tall, and physically attractive in the all-American kind of way. Her partner was a distinguished looking man with a head of thick grayish dark hair, obviously fit, tall, and in his late 40-50s.  They were an attractive couple by any measure.

There was an empty space next to them on the balcony rail so I placed myself directly next to them.   It was an obvious move as they could not help but notice that I was alone and that I was deliberately next to them.  Before long we began talking and doing the exploratory conversational dance to measure mutual interest in chatting or more. 

Sue and I talked for quite a while about her lifestyle history and their lifestyle experiences as a couple. I enjoyed learning about them and how long they had been in the lifestyle and especially their experiences with lifestyle cruises which are of particular interest to me.  There were also a lot of unspoken exchanges going on between the couple regarding me, them, and the time of the evening. I stayed with them a while as a couple and talked with Sue mostly. Her partner seemed a touch nervous and clearly deferred to Sue.  After a while he went downstairs for more drinks and I stayed and chatted with her.  She was engaging and seemingly interested in the possibilities, but the most intriguing part of the dynamic was her partner watching us like a hawk from the bar below.  He evidently was waiting to see what would transpire, attempting to measure Sue’s interest in me.

It was clear the power and decision-making authority rested firmly in the hands of Sue.  It was also clear to me that it was really early in their evening routine for decisions about play to be made.  As Sue explained to me, they habitually do not move toward the play segment of their evening until after a few drinks were under their belt to loosen them up. Ah, so they were part of the swinging world where alcohol seems to be a mandatory part of foreplay.  Definitely not for me, as I find the pleasure to be infinitely more exquisite without the dulling effects of booze. But, then again, maybe imbibing would lead to reduced inhibitions and new adventures. But, probably not for me, I would probably just get nauseous!

When her partner returned with fresh drinks for the two of them, we all watched the dancers on the dance floor with an intense focus on the sexy woman dancing in the elevated cage.   The couple began to close the conversation a bit and discussed how sexy the super thin caged lady was and how incredible her abs were. And then they oddly discussed a comparison between Sue’s abs and those of the woman dancing.  At this point I opt to take an out. I excused myself leaving them with an open window to get together later in the night.  It was clear to me that it was too early in the evening for them to commit to play as they still needed to drink, and dance with the beautiful people (and they definitely exuded a beautiful people preference).  And that is exactly what happened.  The next time I saw them they were dancing with the abs lady and her partner on the dance floor.

After leaving Sue and her partner, I hung out at the end of the orgy bar upstairs and watched sexy people come and go.  I was adjacent the playroom where Ron, Nora, Ben and Madeline were playing.  I voyeuristically peered in and they were clearly enjoying themselves. I was standing very near one of the club volunteers, an attractive young black man that was enjoying watching my backside sway to the music.  Though he was working and not allowed to play, he was certainly busy flirting with me and practicing his pick up lines.  He said something about my rhythm, which was apparently, to his mind, better than most white women.  He enjoyed watching my ass sway and commented on how amazing it was – men have often told me that I have a black girl’s ass, though I have never really understood what exactly that means.  I was amused by his efforts and flirting, but he was obviously a bit intimidated by me.  At one point he resorted to complimenting the pattern on my dress, which he said he liked because it was African.  Now hold on there, African?  What a hoot!  I lived in Africa for four years and the pattern of my dress was in no way African.  Wow was this young man stretching.  But, stretching or not, it was too bad he was working or I would have enjoyed his company. 

I continued to enjoy the music, which I usually deemed to be far too loud with gutting wrenching reverberation, and enticing people watching.  I just chilled out at the end of the orgy bar and took it all in.  I was in a strange and perplexing state of perpetual, hypnotic voyeurism.  I was enthralled by watching people chat, dance, connect, play, suck, finger and fuck with each other. Like last night, I found myself very content to not engage, but rather to observe. I felt like I was in an otherworldly bubble, drifting and floating around imminently untouchable.

After a while I noticed that Ron was no longer engaged in the action with Madeline, Nora and Ben. He was reposed on the left side of the bed watching the other three indulge themselves, Ben’s fingers thrusting away at Nora’s pussy and Madeline enjoying touching Nora.  I entered their sex-filled den and connected with Ron briefly.  I reached out and touched his naked body, running my fingertips across his chest and shoulders feeling the fresh residual sexual heat that emanated from his still pulsing body and the perspiratory stickiness of a raucous good time.  Just the briefest touch of his moist skin and I knew that I could not wait to have him inside me.  I had backed off this particular play session but at the touch of his skin, I was all of a sudden ravenously impatient for a romp with Ron myself.

Knowing what I was thinking, Ron headed downstairs to shower, freshen up and rejuvenate.  I followed him down as far as the mid-night snacks and had a rare chocolate chip cookie.  That I actually wanted and successfully consumed a cookie at midnight in a sex club was outrageous for me.  I had never been able to eat anything at this time of night during sexy club play.  Then again, I had not been fucking anyone, at all this evening.  Unrestrained, freewheeling sexual intercourse typically left me famished yet entirely unable to touch food until the next morning, even the smell of food turned me away after a royally good fucking evening.  I guessed that my insides were so intensely heated and jarred by the physicality of the fucking that there was just not space in my being for that sort of nourishment.   So clearly I was way off my game on that night, sitting there eating a cookie! And that was more than a bit disturbing and rather thoroughly discombobulating.

Sometime a little later I passed the same sexy couple from my flirtations earlier in the evening on the steps.  They were alone and they both gave me a very warm and inviting smile, so I guessed that the abs lady and her partner had not panned out quite to their expectation.  They seemed happy and a touch excited to see me again, but I was already on a mission and had plans with Ron at this point (though I am sure he would have welcomed the company).  So maybe on a future club visit we can connect.  This had been an experimental jaunt for me and honestly, I was uncomfortable trying to initiate the ‘couple connection’ as a unicorn and did not feel super successful.  But, maybe I laid groundwork for another time.  Perhaps it was just a good practice session of trying to reach out for a couple to play with – couples have pretty much always come looking for me previously and I had zero practice in recruiting a couple myself.

I actually find playing with couples to be somewhat treacherous territory, as one can never really know their desires nor understand the vagaries of their couple dynamics that operate just below the surface.  Do they want me for her?  For him?  For both?  And what level of play and touching is desirable? What is off limits? And I am often attracted to her and not him, or him and not her, but they come as a package! And where are the lines in the sand that must be honored.  I had yet to enter a couple dynamic with full disclosure.  Rather it was a bit of trail by fire. Couples were complicated and difficult to navigate and I still could not decide if they were worth it!

A newly invigorated Ron and I went to a nearby playroom on our own.  Nora, Ben and Madeline were still otherwise engaged and we did not think Ron would be missed.  The door was open, the curtains left askance so we would certainly be easy to find it anyone was looking for us. Ron and I were intensely focused and sexually aggressive with each other in a series of oral, fingering and fucking acts that brought us both ecstatic pleasures.  We had been in each other’s presence all day but had not actually touched and engaged each other sexually for the entire day so some sexual tension had built between us.  And that might well have been a record amount of time that we had spent together without actually fucking each other.  I had purposefully deferred earlier from engaging with the group activity, but was wanton and ravenous by the time Ron and I emerged upon the opportunity to satisfy our mutually libidinous sexual appetites.   

Once our initial rapacious burst of sexual energy was dissipated, we glanced at the wide open door to see a thirty something man with dark hair with a tantalizing bohemian look studying us intently.  Actually Ron quite often watched the door while he fingered me or even while we fucked, presumably not wanting to let a potential opportunity pass us by.  I was usually too consumed with my own pleasure to even remember the door was there.  We invited the man, who was sexy in an intriguingly dark and subversive way, with a twinge of pessimistic worldliness about him, to join in our sexual frolicking, and more specifically in fucking me, but he declined saying, “I am content to watch “ with a curiously judgmental tone. 

With his declination to engage, an older man emerged and promptly accepted our play invitation.  He possessed a lengthy, generous, promising cock that was sure to please.  Even Ron commented on the impressive size and how I was ‘really going to like this one.’ And with a glance down between his thighs, the butterflies in my groin instantly and urgently confirmed my own interest in this new member. However, when Mr. Impressively Big Dick presented himself to me to suck his cock, and I began to comply, Ron told him he would have to wear a condom.  He promptly applied said sheath but did not seek to engage me through penetration.  Rather he wanted to only have his dick sucked.   I was not super interested in sucking on a condom-clad cock because it tasted of latex and that is just not very appealing.  Further, I really only wanted to suck his cock if it was going to lead to a good hard fuck by his glorious cock.  Sucking cock is fun but in these circumstances, only as a prelude to deep penetration and a good hard fuck.

But this man with his beautiful cock did not do penetration.  House rules.  He was allowed to play but his cock was reserved for his partner’s pussy.  Really, it would have been nice if he had been upfront about his limits so as to better manage expectations.  Mine in particular! This would have been a perfect opportunity for an ‘elevator speech.’ But, he did not make anything clear up front other than his desire for me to suck his big hard cock.  Bummer. While I was recovery from my slight disappointment at the loss of a potentially fun penetrative sexual act, Ron began to finger me causes amazing squirts.   I think Ron knew by now that as the evening goes on and as I get more ramped up I just get easier and easier to make climax.  And his fingers are pure gold. 

After some amazing G-spot ejaculatory orgasms, the non-penetrative gentleman went down on my very wet and swollen pussy.  His mouth was nice, soft, gentle and warm, but simply did not know where my clit was.  It was a very pleasant experience but there was absolutely nothing arousing about it.  Rather it kind of made me want to curl up and drift off into a nice warm, cocooned nap. During all of this time a young dark-haired (maybe Hispanic) couple watched us from the foot of the bed.  Never touching. Never approaching. Never even communicating with us in any way.  She sucked her partner’s cock and they evidently got off by their proximity to our less restrained sexual exploits.  They enjoyed our company without any interaction whatsoever.

Ron and I made our way to the showers, which the sex clubs so generously provide.  Aside from rinsing off, it is a nice way to enjoy the company of another naked, slippery body.  While I have never been much of a fun person to shower with, my interest in showers and sharing of showers has been increasing over the last several months.  And these days I actually expect to have company in the shower at clubs and hotels.  Beyond a functional hygienic necessity, showering together has become an enjoyed shared intimacy. 

Unfortunately, this shower was marred slightly by the appearance of an exceptionally wasted woman.  There was not much positive about a clearly intoxicated woman placing herself in the chair at the entrance of our shower stall and hanging her head into a trash receptacle.   That unfortunate incident put an immediate kibosh on that shower.  I knew that I needed to get clear of this woman and fast.  Her hurling was not going to do anything for my evening other than possibly make me hurl.  So, I high tailed it out of there as quickly as I could dry off and dress.

Later in the night I found myself on one of the leather sofas by the dancing pole. I was on Ron’s left and Nora was on his right.  Ron had his fingers in Nora’s pussy and I had Ron’s cock in my mouth.  We were playing around for a while when I looked up and rather surprisingly saw that Nora had some guys cock in her mouth.  I had not a clue from whence he came.  He was suddenly just there, erect hard cock, being sucked avidly by Nora.  Bam! These things do seem to materialize in strange ways.  Somehow the four of us managed to communicate a desire to ramp up the action a bit and before I knew it we were in the fish bowl.

Ron and I were on the right side of the bed (from my vantage) sucking, fingering and fucking in familiar, yet erotically charged, and astounding climactically productive ways.  Familiarity over the course of many months had lead to an almost Pavlovian physical response to Ron’s fingers on my G-Spot.  I squirt routinely and predictably and, these days, seemingly more copiously.  Wet spots and drenched towels are par for the course when fucking in the clubs lately.  Nora and this other man were on the other side of the bed.  He was fingering her and she was really vocal and enthusiastic in her responses.  Nora seemed to really be enjoying his touch and technique.

As always, I was enjoying my sexual play with Ron and Nora seemed quite happy to play with the black guy, whose name I never heard.  I was perfectly content and comfortable with the dynamic.  And then Ron asked for a switch. He enjoyed his wife, Nora, and the heated, staunchly erect nameless guy fingered me, and managed to make me squirt, as well.  I was again surprised that the touch of another so readily led to an ejaculatory response.  But, in hindsight, I think that unrestrained, wild sexual abandon combined with hours of on again off again play that my G-Spot was just ripe for the picking.   The black man with his somewhat diminutive though stone hard cock wanted to fuck me now that he had successfully made me cum with just his fingers.  I said that he most certainly could fuck me, if he put on a condom, he said absolutely, great…but he could never manage to stay erect and get a condom on…so never sealed the deal. 

I learned later that he had not fucked Nora either, but I did not know that for certain at the time.  If he had, it would have been condom free, because this guy could not keep an erection with a condom to save his life.  Ah well, I did not feel a loss here.  The weekend had been strange and sex was just not the end all for me this weekend.  Being present and in good erotic, company was enough to keep me purring.

While the cock failed to comply with the condom application, another man in dress pants, a white button down shirt and a tie leaned against the window watching the scene with a lustful eye.  Ron invited him to join our group play but he declined repeatedly saying that he would just enjoy the view.  And that he did, with occasional sidebar commentary. It turned out that the well-dressed guy outside the window was not allowed to fuck, but he was apparently allowed to watch and touch.  He watched, conversed, got me water, and generally enjoyed the show.

Around this time, Madeline and Ben came in to say good-bye.  I was sitting naked on the bed I leaned forward to hug Madeline.  And then I kissed her and then really kissed her.  Madeline was a fun woman to kiss and one of the few women that I actually really enjoy kissing.  Her mouth and tongue are delectable and velvety.  As I kissed her I could feel her reluctance to leave and out of the corner of my eye, I could see Ben unzip his fly releasing his already hard cock, stroking it with pleasure. Madeline smiled and lustfully said that she really looked forward to seeing me the next time I was going to be at the club. And then Madeline, Ben and Nora departed the play space.

Ron and I started playing again and his fingers inside me made me buck and squirm with delirious, intoxicating pleasure.  He made me squirt like crazy, even gushingly so at one point…what the heck, my body was not my own.  I was seriously amazed at my capacity for this tonight.  Maybe I was sooo relaxed, or so raw and sensitive….I was certainly not this quick to squirt in the early part of the night. It did seem to take some effort to get the squirting machine running earlier in the evening, but once it got revved up it was impressive.

After another orgasmic round and with no obvious takers, Ron and I relaxed and I covered myself with a white cotton sheet because I was unexpectedly chilled.  As I was resting from what had turned into a long session of fingering, sucking and fucking; another man apparently asked Ron if I wanted another cock.  Now at this point I had been abundantly exposed, on absolute erotic display in utterly uninhibited, intimate sexual arrangements for quite sometime; the door and window had been wide open for any takers; and the invitation to fuck me had been quite explicit and it was clear that men or couples could join our play.  But, shyness, hesitancy, reluctance or whatever it was had gotten the better of most.  Had he joined in earlier, I would have gladly fucked him.  But at this point I was regrettably rude and said something to the effect of ‘sure, as long as I do not have to do the work’ – super rude, I know.  With that, he went away.  I should have been kind to him.  But, I if he wanted to fuck me he should have said so.  Instead he delayed his expression of interest and couched it in a manner that seemed to be to fulfill my insatiable sexual needs, as if he might be doing me a favor.  I did not need a favor.

The next thing I know, a young couple climbed in the window and occupied the space on the bed directly next to Ron and I.  Without a word or even a glance in our direction, they started to play.  Ron and I were mildly perplexed.  Were we allowed to touch??  Yes.  Could I kiss her??  She was a bit ambivalent but did not really say no, so I kissed her once gently on the lips and she did not respond.  I kissed her neck and fondled her breasts briefly and then took her nipples in my mouth.  Her partner was clearly very enthusiastic about this action.  However, she was decidedly ambivalent and more than a little tense.  He wanted her to remove her dress.  She did not want to remove her dress.  She kept her eyes closed tightly.  It was very quickly glaringly apparant that she was here because he wanted her to be not because she wanted to be.   And that is no way to play in a swingers club.

I only touched non-sexually after that – a hand on her thigh or a caress of her calf.  I wanted to be supportive and not sexual.  I did not wish to escalate her already palpable anxiety. Her partner went down on her, and then reached down and took my hand with out my consent.  He guided my hand to between her legs and urged me to touch her pussy.  I did not engage and withdrew my hand while she shifted her body away making it obvious to everyone, other than maybe her partner, that she was not eager for this type of sexual interaction.  I was uncomfortably reluctant and did not appreciate being a pawn in his plan when at this point is was very clear that she did not want the bi-sexual play nor did she want another man to touch her, which, to his credit, Ron picked up on almost immediately. 

I sat at the end of the bed dodging errant spiked heels while the couple played.  I was getting ready to leave the play space when out of seemingly nowhere, the fully dressed guy climbed through the window to play with me a bit.  He reached between my thighs almost immediately and put his hand on my pussy.  Before I knew it his fingers were deep in my cunt and he fingered my pussy until I squirted with orgasmic pleasure while he sucked and caressed my breasts, all the while he was fully clothed.  I explored his overly full front pants pockets wondering what the heck was making such a knotty bulge.  It sure was not his cock!  He had everything but the kitchen sink in his front trousers pockets as he had opted to not use a locker for his valuable that evening.  

After not finding what I was looking for in his fully clothed lower half, I called it a night. The evening had been a bit surreal.  I passed on what would have been excellent group sex with Ron, Nora, Madeline and Ben; and was all other worldly focused on my voyeuristic self for quite a long time; I had great sexual play with Ron; fucked someone completely unmemorable; and had odd encounters with two men who operated with explicit play restrictions.  I was impressed that these two different men were fully compliant and willingly abided by their sexual agreements with their significant others, and even more impressed that the fully clothed gentleman late in the evening was able to be explicit in what his boundaries were.  That was a much better approach that the one that Mr. Big Dick took early on in the evening. 

Weird night all around!  I dressed and departed the fish bowl.  Nora was still sitting at the orgy bar where she had been watching our antics. We collected ourselves and headed off to our shared motel room for the night.  As unusual for me as portions of the two nights had been, I felt like things were as they should be and I was deeply content.  It would have been nice to literally experience more men sexually through actual penetration, but I was sated nonetheless. No complaints, just limited variety, but that was partially my fault.  But, I was utterly and thoroughly content with the sexy weekend of non-monogamy.   Ron, being one of my favorite lovers, and Nora, his incredibly supportive wife, were natural partners to pass into my second year of a life filled with non-monogamous sexual adventures, sheer fantasy and exquisite pleasures.