September 6th, Firsts, Firsts and More Firsts

Our first couple night out since our disastrous jaunt on Memorial weekend proved to be a whirlwind of sex and firsts.  Nick and I were hoping to drum up a Gang Bang so we choose the club that tends to have more unattached men.  We had originally wanted to go on ‘Gang Bang’ night as designated by the club.  That particular night seemed to attract more men and women that are attracted to extreme sexual play.  But, for unknown reasons, the club decided to no longer theme their weekend parties as ‘Gang Bang’ parties, which for people like me was a major bummer.  It was my favorite theme and a guaranteed good time.

So we ended up at the club on ‘Naughty School Girl’ night.  I wore a tight black short-sleeved top with purple plaid that tied just under my breasts and made for a delectable bodacious offering.  My short black mini-skirt and bar mid-drift, black knee high socks completed the picture. I felt supremely naughty and was ready for action.

I knew when we arrived at the club that Nick and I were hoping to have a multi-partner sexual evening of some sort.  But, I was not prepared for Nick’s enthusiasm!  After arriving and before we even made it to the lockers to put our things away, Nick had stopped three couples and told them that he was organizing a Gang Bang for his wife and invited them to partake. I was a bit embarrassed by his forthrightness and also taken aback that Nick did not even confer with me in the slightest about my level of interest in these couples.  While I am not especially picky about who fucks me during Gang Bangs, it would be nice to be included in the fun of selecting possible men to fuck me. 

Shortly after we arrived, Ron and Nora appeared with Celeste.  We exchanged greetings.  I could instantly feel a level of discomfort that I could not quite pinpoint.  I did not know if Nick was uncomfortable with Ron, if Celeste was uncomfortable with me, or if Ron was uncomfortable with my married dynamic, or all of the above, or none of the above.  Whatever it was, I could feel some tension and anxiety emanating form the group that was slightly unsettling.

However, Nick set a pace for the evening that was so intense that I did not have any time to consider much of anything.  Nick’s trend of inviting people to fuck me continued upstairs.  I barely had a chance to finish my gin and tonic before he asked me (told me?) to climb up on the pussy/orgy bar so he could eat me out.  The orgy bar was a long bar running through the middle of the upstairs of the club.  On one side was a very large play area that was perfect for highly exhibitionist group play and the other side was for people standing around chatting or watching.  I had never played in the wide-open orgy pit.  Nor had I ever been physically on the bar with my pussy being served up like an exotic delicacy. 

Luckily, Ron realized what Nick was up to and went around the corner to get a towel for me to sit on.  A juicy bare nether region placed directly on a very public surface is not exactly the most sanitary thing for me, or those who follow!   So, with a plush white cotton towel draped across the bar, I lifted my tight black mini-skirt up to try and keep it dry for the evening and shimmied up onto the bar.  Ron, who is evidently experienced in on-bar play, quickly offered to provide support for me from the other side of the bar.  I turned out to be enormously thankful for the physical support as I was being eaten out.  Otherwise I may well have slid right on off the bar.  Balance when sexually aroused is not my strong point.

Up on the bar my black, knee-high sock clad legs sought to secure themselves on the nearby stools as Nick dove into my crotch headfirst.  He enjoyed licking and sucking on my pussy as Ron was kissing me and caressing and exposing my breasts.  We were literally in the middle of a crowded room and couples were passing by and stopping to watch. As my body began to relax and respond to the erotic stimulation I open my eyes and gazed around me.  I saw men and women watching me, and our entirely public sexual play.  Their eyes were eagerly taking in the scene and I felt utterly exposed and this made me more desirous than ever. 

Nick lifted his head and smiled at me and then turned to the voyeurs and offered them a sampling of my juicy, not so private, private parts.  Needless to say there were other men who wanted to taste my pussy.  Nick offered me up and then turned to me and said, “That is okay, isn’t it?” While I was okay with sharing my body, I was less okay with the ask from Nick being post-invitation and entirely public.  A more subtle approach before offering me up to any takers would have been appreciated.  I wonder if Nick just assumed that because I have given my body so freely with many men that I would not care.  And maybe there is truth in that idea.  However, I would have appreciated it if Nick had asked my in a more private manner with a private exchange of a look or words.  The way it was done, I felt a bit like a commodity.

So a long-haired older gentleman named Daniel, eagerly, softly and enthusiastically began to eat my pussy as his diminutive, attractive, earthy-looking wife stood by and watched.  It was gentle and pleasant but not earth shattering.  It did hold potential though and I would have been interested in playing with him later if the opportunity arose. Afterward his wife came up to me and said,  “You made my husband’s night.” It was nice that sharing my body could bring such pleasure to other people.  And it made me feel good that she expressed appreciation as well since I was not always certain that the female partners appreciated my sharing as much as their men. It certainly brought me pleasure. 

When Daniel finished, Daryl immediately replaced him between my legs and began to eat my very wet and somewhat swollen pussy.  Daryl, being the third man in a row to spend time between my legs with his tongue on my cunt and sucking vigorously was only serving to get me more excited.  I do not usually climax with just oral, but after a while with good technique, it does start to bring me closer to an ecstatic state. Unfortunately, Daryl was a bit rough with his facial stubble and I soon needed a break.  This was the second time that Daryl had eaten my pussy.  The stubble factor seems to be a consistent theme with him and is a bit of a turn off after a while.

I sat up fully and began to alight the bar, and asked Nick to get me a drink.  He seemed slightly reluctant to leave me for reasons that I did not understand.  I had to ask a couple of times, and eventually tell him to get me a drink. Maybe he could not hear me – the club was deafeningly loud at times.  When he came back Ron, Nora, Nick and I walked over toward the balcony to see what else was happening upstairs besides the active pussy bar.  I noticed that the fishbowl was open for play and I felt a flutter of excitement in my groin.  I walked over to the balcony to see what was happening on the dance floor since I needed a little break and I enjoyed watching sexy women dance in the cage and go down on men and each other as the occasion arises.

I had only had a couple of sips of my drink at the balcony when Nick pushed me up to the edge, leaned me over the balcony, pulled up my skirt, rammed his cock in my cunt and began fucking me hard from behind.  I held on tightly to my glass because I was afraid that I would drop it.  Luckily Nora was standing next to me.  She reached around and took the glass from my hand.  She knew that I was likely to drop it down onto partiers below.  Nick was thrusting his hard cock into me vigorously while everyone nearby and aware watched our fully clothed fuck.  Of course there were others immediately adjacent to us that were entirely unaware of our brazen act…making it even more illicit.  It is amazing what can happen right next to people without their knowledge.  In his enthusiasm, Nick somehow managed to slam my drink out of Nora’s hand and it smashed into a thousand bits on the carpet by our feet.  The glass and mess summarily ended our balcony fuck as we stopped to try and clean it up.  In hindsight, I suppose the shoes requirement at the club is a justified idea considering the extent to which the glass shattered into a millions little shards.  But, I am generally not fond of shoes….unless they are sexy as hell.

After getting the glass cleaned up the four of us went into the fishbowl in hopes of some Gang Bang action. Nora and I both really enjoyed Gang Bangs….the more cocks the better!  As before, Gang Bangs could be a bit of a blur for me.  I remembered Nick standing stark naked at the open window trying to round up participants.  There was a lot of interest but few brave souls. 

A short, stout, heavily tattooed man vigorously ate my pussy for what seemed like a good long while. His head was shaved bald but felt bristly and thick scalped under my hands.  I was ready for him to move off me and applied light pressure to his head as an indication that he release his hold on my cunt and it was like pushing an entrenched boulder.  He did not budge in the slightest and did not take my hint.  Once he had satisfied his oral needs with my pussy he moved up to my head so I could take him in my mouth.  When Nick leaned over and told him that I was not going to suck on his dick he moved over to pleasure Nora. She did take his cock deep into her mouth.  I was aware of the pleasure that Nora was deriving from the men that were pleasuring her.  She was very verbal and there was no way a man would not know exactly what she wanted and how he made her feel.  She was an excellent communicator while fucking. Then at some point I hazily recalled glancing over at Nora and seeing a man ejaculate on her breasts. Someone had some fun! But, the spunk on her breasts did not seem to thrill her.

When the tatted, bald man moved off me, Ron took advantage of the void and filled me with his cock.  He knew that I would not have been satisfied with only a man’s lips and tongue…even if highly skilled.  Oral alone was rarely my cup of tea.  While Ron pounded my pussy, Nick moved over to play with Nora.  I think he fingered her and ate her pussy while Ron and I fucked.  But, my memories ran together as usual during intense sexual encounters. It was fun to swap and know that my husband was playing as well.  I like swapping as a couple though we rarely find a compellingly steamy occasion to do so while we are both in the proper headspace to enjoy it!

Somewhere in the midst of it all, I needed to use the ladies.   Soooo, I put on my shoes as required and walked through the crowd completely nude – well, except for my schoolgirl knee high socks.  It was a very crowded room at this point and I had to squeeze through numerous people to make my way to the ladies room.  I really have no idea what, if anything, my nude walk may have stirred up.  I was utterly focused on my mission and still savoring my residual orgasmic bliss.  I was altogether oblivious to my surroundings beyond recognizing individual bodies (but not faces) as I made my way through the crowd.  Apparently Nick was hanging out the window of the fishbowl to make sure I made it safely to and from the restroom.  But, honestly, I felt totally safe with all the people around and with several club volunteers present and nearby.

I am not sure what happened after this but I distinctly remember fucking two different men.  Ron had finished fucking me and I laid back contentedly chatting with Nora when she said, ‘Oh, your gonna like this one!” And oh yeah!  A new hard cock plunged into my pussy.  It definitely got my attention.  I gasped and turned to face the owner.  I heard Nora laugh at me as 99% of my attention instantly shifted to focus exclusively on the fucking at hand and this new man.  His cock was delicious in my pussy and hit just the right spots and before I knew it, I was climaxing.  I looked up and saw an attractive man smiling down at me with a mischievous spark in his eyes and looking a little bit like a child in a candy store who just stuck gold.  He had an appealing, solid rugby player type body. After some intense orgasmic fucking, Willem introduced himself to me in a delightful European accent that was readily identifiable.  Yummy!  (Shallow to get turned on by a non-American accent – maybe, but way the hell not?) I remember an exchange between Willem and myself about hoping to play again later in the evening.  I definitely wanted more of that!

Willem also had the distinction of fingering me with the perfect intensity bringing me to an orgasmic squirt, which was a huge surprise for me.  It is very unusual for anyone to make me squirt and only a handful of sexually proficient men have raised me to this pinnacle.

Next thing I knew a dark-haired, striking man in his late twenties was fucking me.  His cock was inside me before I knew what was happening.  He was youthful energetic and super enthusiastic.  He was thrusting his cock into me while holding my legs up in the air.  He rejoiced in his carnal indulgence with probably the most gusto of any sexual partner I have had since I began being non-monogamous.  Suddenly he took my right leg and swung it around so that both my legs were on his right and his plunged deep inside me and exclaimed boisterously.  Then he withdrew his member from inside me and with remarkable intensity and fervor rose to his feet and declared loudly, “Mama, I salute you!”  Oh my god, did that make me laugh, I was beside myself with delight for this truly fantastical fuck.  He was just plain fun all the way around and enthusiastic as hell.  Hmmmm, maybe I should be pursuing more young men.  This was great!

After Ramon duly saluted me, my husband welcomed him to invite all the troupes in to fuck me!  I was apparently ready and willing to fuck the lot of them.  But, alas, there were no troupes in the wings.  Celeste came in a plopped down next to my head and very explicitly asked “How is the orgasm queen doing?’ I was not sure what to do with that piece of passive aggressiveness, but I opted to ignore it and decided to call a temporary end to the festivities.

Nick had been marginally successful in finding men willing to join our sexploits.  He had not been able to round up the numbers, but the quality of the men that joined us was commendable and definitely memorable.  As I was dressing a couple of men asked if it was too late to join.  Later I would love to play some more, but at that moment, I wanted a pause.  I also felt like I needed a bit of a break from the sexual intensity and sought out a few minutes away from Nick.  I felt like he had me in a whirlwind and that we were going from one sexual encounter to another with him, and others and that I had not had space to breath or reflect on the night.  I had never seen him so aggressively enthusiastic about taking advantage of every possible sexual opportunity that came our way…or that he was able to whip up.

I went downstairs for a snack and some space and found Ron standing near the buffet and the couple’s room.  I was not really sure which one was the purpose of his presence… the food or sex.  Maybe he had just exited the couple’s room, maybe he was looking for someone….I had no idea.  But, I took the opportunity to just be present with him and talk.  I stood immediately next to him and we talked about relatively mundane life things.  We did not touch at all, nor did we flirt, it was an entirely plutonic style conversation.   We were simply present with each other for a bit of time. 

Both Ron and I were experiencing a new reality with the overwhelming presence of Nick in every nook and cranny of my physical space.  Nick and I had so rarely been out together that it was a new dynamic for everyone involved. Nick was consuming the majority of my focus and energies and I think that Ron was trying to navigate the new scene.  I was enjoying my husband’s newfound sexual confidence, but I, too, was steering through unknown territory. 

Likewise, I had never seen Ron as subdued as he was on this night and I did not know how to interpret it.  I knew that Ron wanted to have good couple dynamic between our two couples, but Ron, Nora and I had had the better part of a year playing and spending time together.  And Nick was decidedly not facilitating inter-couple relations.  At one point Nick had expressed a desire to be part of the triad friendship that Ron, Nora and I had formed.  But on this night, he was seeking something else all together.

Certainly, Nick was on a mission of sorts but I could not ascertain his goals. However, I could see they were aggressively sexual and to the exclusion of Ron and Nora.  He was unrecognizable to me with his overt enthusiasm for me in every sexual capacity. He was certainly being a sexual dynamo, but his seeming comfort level and domineering actions were not readily familiar to me.  And it was exceedingly bizarre to be with my husband and find him to be such an unfamiliar entity. Despite, the mysterious man that my husband was, he was definitely romping good fun even with all the weirdness.

After maybe five or ten minutes Nick rounded the corner from the staircase and saw Ron and I talking.  I am sure that he was not surprised.  He came over and stood next to us with Ron in the middle.  The three of us talked for just a minute and then Nick leaned over and kissed me deeply….immediately in front of Ron’s face.  At the time I felt like it was a purposefully display of male dominance though Nick later denied that there was any intent in the kiss.  Nick then asked me if I wanted to go upstairs, or dance, or go fuck Ron.  I said, “I want to go fuck Ron.”  He said fine, go for it. 

Nora seemed to be out of pocket playing somewhere in the club.  Ron and I looked for her upstairs to let her know what we were doing but she was nowhere to be found.  The upstairs play spaces were all consumed with couples and groups in various states of copulation, so Ron and I resorted to a room downstairs in the back corner of the play area.  I closed the door.  Ron and Nora pretty much never close the doors.  But, I wanted to be alone with Ron for a little while in a known and familiar situation.  I wanted to focus on Ron and not be interrupted by more bodies or men.  We were both a bit out of sorts and I wanted to touch base with him.  I know that it sounds strange to refer to ‘known and familiar’ in reference to Ron when my husband was in the club.  But, truthfully, Nick’s actions were not familiar to me on this night.  Later when we were talking about it he said that he had found his comfort zone in the non-monogamy, sexual world and that this was the new Nick. He had been going to the other club on his own numerous times over the last two months, getting his bearings independently and had a regular favorite playmate, Mona, whom he had enjoyed extensively.

Ron and I had great intense sex despite the obvious anxiety and uncertainty that I could feel from Ron.  We lounged together for a while and chatted a bit and then returned to find our spouses.  We found both Nick and Nora upstairs at the pussy bar exactly where I had been the delicacy on offer just a few hours earlier.  We chatted together for a moment and then Nick began to refocus my attention and conversation way from Ron and Nora.

As Nick explained to me later, he felt a weighty magnetic pull between Ron and myself.  He was absolutely correct; there was a very strong attraction and undeniable pull between Ron and I.  We did tend to migrate toward one another when we were in the same vicinity.  Ron was categorically my preferred extra-marital play partner. And I was one of his preferred….but I have no illusion that I am singular in anyway.  My impression was that after more than a decade in the Lifestyle, Ron had a stable of preferred playmates and that he was always scoping for new opportunities for outstanding sexual connections.

After some generic chit-chat in which I apparently said something to Nick that left him feeling that I was questioning his behavior or defending Ron in someway…though I am still not clear what I said but am sure that whatever it was there was zero intent on my part to ruffle his feathers, Willem reappeared.  Willem, Nick and I talked for a while about apparent commonalities in our lives in terms of international roaming that seem to be firmly entrenched in our blood. 

After about ten minutes of chatting, Nick seemed to want more licentious public bar action.  He physically turned me around, bent me over the bar, lifted my skirt and fucked me from behind again.  I was gripping the bar as my body responded to Nick’s cock pumping hard in and out of my pussy.  Once again, we were in the middle of a crowded room with many onlookers.  I was physically exposed in no way but it was crystal clear that a cock was being rammed up my cunt. Willem mysteriously appeared fully naked up on the bar in front of me.  I was a bit perplexed at this apparition and looked down to see a pile of clothes on the floor beneath me.  Before I knew it, I was leaning on Willem with my hands on his thighs, my hair draped over his left leg with my face between his legs.  I understood the idea was for me to suck his cock while Nick fucked me from behind.   Honesty, I found it a bit challenging to suck a cock while being fucked from behind.  The two divergent rhythms were challenging for me to attain.  And unfortunately, the residue taste of a latex condom was just not yummy and an utter turn off from the cock sucking perspective…I think I need to investigate flavored condoms (and lubes for that matter). Otherwise, I think it would have been a very fun threesome situation.  I acutely felt Nora and Ron to my right watching Nick ram his cock into me with my face resting on Willem’s thigh wishing away residual latex flavors.

Sometime after our bend-over-bar fuck, Ron and Nora indicated that they were heading downstairs for a late night snack.  They always like to eat after hard playing.  I never wanted to do more than nibble and even then I usually found even the smell of food to be repulsive after lots of fucking.  Willem, Nick and I decided to get a room and play some more. I remembered passing by Ron and Nora while they were eating as our trio headed to a back room downstairs. I thought about letting them know where we were going to be but I sensed that Nick was not interested in a larger group activity this time.  We secured the corner room directly straight back from the dining area.  It held a king size bed pushed up in the corner.  Somehow this room seemed more conducive than most for a fucking good time.  It was a new room for me for a decidedly new sexual experience.

Nick asked if we should close the door or leave it open.  My inclination was to leave it open for more potential partner and sexual action, but Willem specifically asked to close the door for a more intimate sexual experience.  I thought that Nick would appreciate a closed door for this new experience and I was not sure he wanted to share me beyond present company.  It was our first MFM.  I had been in several FMF situations but had always longed for an MFM because I loved fucking men and all that it could entail.

Willem and I began to kiss passionately.  He was a good kisser and I enjoyed his rhythm and intensity. I was not clear on what Nick was doing at this point.  I remember a firm slap on my ass by Willem.  I was ambivalent on whether he wanted to take our sexual play more in the slapping direction or whether he was testing the waters to see my reaction.  So far I had not found an erotic zone through spanking or related activities….but that did not mean that the right touch or the right moment would not take me down that new erotic path.  But, in this case, our play continued onto the bed with what became such a whirlwind of hands, cocks, and mouths that was hard for me to keep track of.

Willem had his fingers in my pussy raising my already hungry cunt to the edge of orgasmic ecstasy while Nick kissed me passionately and sucked on my tits.  Willem liked to talk while we played.  He was exceedingly flattering and his words took my cognitive pleasure to another level – I was amazingly able to set aside my mental busybody and focus exclusively on the pleasure of the moment.  Our carnal indulgence was utterly all encompassing.  Rather astoundingly I found myself with hands resting heavily on my neck.  That most unwelcomed sensation joggled me back into myself for a time (and the reasons behind this are extensive and way to lengthy to elaborate on in this post – just suffice it to say that the sensation was most unwelcome and set me ill at ease with gentle warning bells rising from my inner reptilian brain.). Willem judged my reaction accurately and moved his hands away from my throat and plunged his cock into my phenomenally ravenous pussy.

As Willem pounded my pussy with his brilliant cock, he told me to suck my husband’s cock.  I sucked Nick’s cock hungrily and hard while Willem continued to fuck me.  Nick subsequently told me that it was the best blowjob I had given him in years.  Then Willem took it to another level when he leaned down and in a husky, accented voice said, “suck your husband’s cock with me.” I was stunned but did as instructed. I sucked Nick’s cock on one side as Willem sucked his cock from the other side, our lips meeting around my husband’s cock.  The moan the Nick released in response to that illicit sexual moment was probably the most intensely pleasurable moan I have ever heard Nick exude.  The level of pleasure, which Nick derived from this outrageously bodacious sexual digression, stunned me.

Willem continued to fuck me hard and I was teetering on the edge of euphoria. The sexual encounter was phenomenal and pushed to the next level by the heretofore forbidden and unknown.  I continued to suck on Nick’s cock when Willem said, “look [Ellen], I have your husband’s balls in my hand.”  I opened my eyes and Willem was indeed holding Nick’s balls.  Nick’s moans of pleasure were increasingly intense. I looked up and I saw Willem and Nick touching/caressing each other on their arms and backs.  I had no sense of who was initiating the touching, but it was clear that both men were receptive.  Willem seemed to comprehend the sexual power he held over both Nick and I through introducing this new radically edgy bi-sexual play into our sexual realm.

Willem pulled out of me and leaned back exposing his erect cock.  Nick moved and blocked my vision of Willem, so I was unsure of what was happening.  All of the sudden, Willem told me to “lean forward and watch your husband suck my cock.” I leaned forward and Nick had Willem’s hard cock deep in his mouth and appeared to be enthusiastically sucking the entire shaft.  After a minute, Nick rose up and said, “I thought I would return the favor.” Then he took the opportunity to eagerly kiss Willem, who returned the kiss with fervor. Interestingly, Nick reported that the kiss was not to his liking as it was too “tonguey.” I on the other hand thought Willem was an excellent kisser.

I was shocked by all the bi-sexual male activity I had just witnessed.  I was stunned by my husband’s willingness, nay eagerness, to explore his bi-curious side.  That said I knew that he was open to exploration “if the opportunity presented itself.” So I guess I should not have been too surprised that he so readily embraced the opportunity. But I was shell-shocked by it all. Afterward, Nick told me that he was not particularly taken with the experimentation and was decidedly into women.  Yet, I could hear the depth of his pleasure reverberate in the recesses of my mind.

It all became a blur at this point.  I think Willem fucked me some more.  I recall the application of condoms and the removal of several condoms during the course of our play.  Then I remember Willem moving to my left side closer to my head.  He told Nick to fuck me while my hand was on Willem’s cock sliding off the latest condom.  Nick proceeded to fuck me with more zeal and enthusiasm than I have experienced with him in a very, very long time.  At this point, I was dripping wet, hugely swollen and desperately wanting to continue my orgasmic stretch.  I had been having orgasms on and off for hours at this point.  I was so exquisitely sensitive and on the precipice of extreme euphoric pleasure that a strong wind would probably have been enough to cause my body to quake in unadulterated pleasure. 

In the midst of it all, my husband whispered in my ear, “Do you want to do a DP?” I do not know if Willem was aware of my husband’s proposition. I knew it was also something that Nick is eager to try.  It was my second DP offer, and despite it being well established on my bucket list, I declined. I wanted to know the second male better than just a night of sex.  A DP is a more intense sexual activity and I need a base level of trust that takes some time to garner.  Anal sex has been off my play list for quite a long time and re-initiating it with a total stranger was not something that I wanted to do.  And besides, the night had truly exceeded my comfort level on a plethora of levels already and I remained a bit stunned and shell-shocked.  I was not ready for yet another new experience.

As soon as we ended our unbridled, carnal indulgence I felt an urgent need for space.  I felt the need for escape and retreat. The night had been overflowing with frenzied sexual immoderation and bi-sexual experimentation that reached beyond anything I was prepared for.  It was wildly erotic, tantalizingly excessive, and orgasmically euphoric. 

It was a night of sexual firsts right, left and center.

First MFM

First male bi-sexual experience

First time up on the pussy bar

First time fucked from behind over the balcony rail in the midst of a crowd

First time fucked from behind with my face in another man’s crotch

First time a total stranger made me squirt

I left the club in the wee hours with Nick.  I was exhausted, well-fucked and stunned.  I retreated into myself and did not really come out to discuss the evening for several days. It was a night full of sexual excess and bizarreness that I could barely interpret. I was struggling to understand everything that took place that night as the layers were too complicated and numerous to readily extract and fully comprehend.

Despite my hesitancy and reluctance expressed above, I would do a repeat of the night in an instant.  The bizarreness of the night was far, far out weighed by the delicious, illicit eroticness and the prodigious carnal euphoria that still envelops my lascivious passions.

September 2nd, An Impromptu Hotel Romp

My last weekend out left me feeling unsettled about my relationship with Ron and Nora.  Ron has been emphatic that we have a ‘friendship’ rather than a ‘relationship’. And I see the point he is trying to make in terms of differentiating between close friends with benefits and his marriage.  I certainly am not seeking a relationship in terms of the kind that grows and develops and evolves into something much more than a ‘friends with benefits’ situation.  He is married to Nora and I am married to Nick.  And neither of us is even slightly interested in changing that.  But, for me, a friendship is a relationship by definition. But the semantics is tripping me up these days.

We had a couple of e-mail exchanges during the intervening week in which I reinforced my still raw feelings and emotions resulting from my discovering Ron and Mona entwined in an intimate cuddle session.  I thought it might be good to get together and talk through it a bit so that the heaviness would not be hanging over my head.  I wanted to clear the tangled web from my psyche.

Ron and Nora were driving south from a three-day Labor Day weekend at the club.  It sounded like a super fun sexy weekend and I had originally hoped to attend, but a health issue and my sour mood got the better of me.  My husband had attended part of the festivities and thoroughly enjoyed Mona (the very same), as usual.  I was still sorting out my feelings and emotions from my last outing and was not sure how I felt about anything. I was even questioning whether the lifestyle was a good path for me.  I had had a chance to chat with Bill and talk through my thoughts and emotions some.  It is always helpful to touch base with other non-monogamous individuals and couples to try and find one’s bearings in this strange wild new universe where the rules of the game are fluid and shift according to personalities and individual desires.

I met Ron and Nora in the parking lot of a Safeway.  We planned to have lunch and talk, but I was not able to give them clear directions to the restaurant so we opted for a secondary meet up point.  I was looking forward to just being present with them and gauging my own emotional and physical reaction to their company. We ended up at yet another Mexican restaurant.  We sat in a corner booth away from the main dining section, with Ron and I on one side and Nora on the other.   I oddly climbed in first, placing myself nearest the window and effectively trapping myself in the booth.  Once we all settled in and started talking, I felt an almost panicked sense of entrapment at my lack of immediate access to physical freedom.  I was caged by my own actions.  I know that sounds dramatic and ridiculous but I have a very strong fight or flight response and even when I manage to sit still during difficult conversations, I am eased significantly if I know that there is a ready escape route.

But, of course, that is all foolishness.  Who needed to escape from what?  But my antiquated reptilian instinct was powerful nonetheless. And I was squirming in my seat – and not in a good erotic way but rather in a desperately uncomfortable having this conversation kind of way.

We ordered lunch and just talked.  I do not even really know what we said.  I recall reiterating my embarrassment over my reactions to Ron’s time with Mona.  Ron told me how much he valued our friendship and that he has lots of friends.  And yes, we all know that.  Again, Ron made a distinction between friendships and relationships.  And again, for me it is very artificial since I believe that a friendship is a relationship, and that a relationship does not imply more, but in his mind it obviously does.  We both discussed our commitment to our spouses and I made certain that Nora heard that I had absolutely no interest in more than fun sexy times with Ron. 

What ever we said over lunch helped to settle us and allowed us to find a mutual level of comfort.  By the end of lunch I found my hand wandering into Ron’s lap.  My sexual desire to reunite with him was surging in a way that was not possible to ignore. The mammalian urges were tremendously strong.  We touched under the table making an attempt to be subtle.  Eventually Nora bluntly suggested we get a hotel room.

Ron secured a room at a hotel just across the highway from the restaurant. While Ron registered for the room, Nora and I talked in the parking lot.  She was a bit squirrely.  I told her that if she did not want this to happen that she should say so and I would leave.  I told her that if she asked me to exit the friendship for good that I would.  But that she needed to communicate her desires to me because I could not read her mind or interpret her non-verbal communications.  Then she stunned me.  She said, “if Ron was not already married to her that she could easily see Ron and I married.”  She had apparently shared that tidbit with others (who I am not clear) earlier in the year.  I was absolutely flabbergasted.  This had never, ever crossed my mind, not even once.  I was not even remotely non-monogamous in order to find a different life partner. I was non-monogamous to have great sex with a variety of sexual partners.  Period.  Without complications or expectations. And the degree to which sexual partners and their spouses have become friends has been an added bonus that I had underestimated from the get go.  Nora left me shocked, bewildered and utterly speechless.  But she did not ask me to go.

I assumed that if anyone was actually going to make use of the hotel room it would be the three of us together, but when Ron eagerly extended and re-extended the offer for Nora to join us, she declined emphatically.  The dynamic between them was a bit odd and I could not understand what was happening.  She was purposefully leaving the two of us alone in the hotel room.  She later said that she thought Ron and I needed a chance to communicate with each other on a one-on-one basis after the fall out the previous weekend.  Ron later told me that he was eager for her to join because once he had been left in a hotel room with a woman who subsequently sought to replace Nora.  Obviously that did not go well.

Ron and I went to the room. Nora went shopping.  And, I seriously questioned the wisdom of continuing with the plan. But, again, I decided to take Nora and Ron at their word.  It was their responsibility to communicate with me if something was amiss.  It would be inappropriate for me to assume that I could read them correctly and reach the correct conclusions on my own.

Ron and I had an hour and a half of intense sexual connection that was phenomenally amazing.  We had never been completely alone. Ever.  Nora is nearly always with us and when she was not, we were in public places with others nearby, watching, or climbing onto the bed with us. It was a bit disconcerting for me to have Nora leave us alone.  On the heels of our parking lot conversation and her unexpected declaration about Ron and I, I was not entirely sure that I should be in the room alone with Ron, at all.  But, Nora encouraged it.  And Ron was eager for it.  And I wanted to be with him to find our balance; and sexually was the best way to do that. 

In this world of ethical non-monogamy, communication is vital and I can only take people on their word.  I cannot assume what I think someone might be thinking, wanting and not saying is even remotely accurate.  I know people misinterpret me a great deal of the time.  Even within my own marriage of nearly 20 years, Nick and I continually misinterpret each other.  And we obviously know each other very, very well with a shared lifetime. If Nick and I cannot always read each other accurately, how can I have the slightest hope of presuming to understand even for a minute anything that Nora (or anyone else) could be thinking? I take her at her word.  And if she wants something from me, for me to do something differently, or for me to leave the friendship, then she will have to say so. Until then, I will take her at her word and I will continue to savor the intensely pleasurable sexual connection that Ron and I enjoy.

August 24th, A Shiny New Penny

I walked into the club and instantly felt uneasy.  I was taken by surprise by unforeseen anxiety and shortness of breath.  It was my first visit to the club since the boundary-breaking encounter with Fabio and its unfortunate repercussions with Nick.  I did not expect it to difficult for me to return.  Bill reminded me that I was safe among friends. Phil updated me on the status of club reprimands for Fabio’s misguided actions and reassured me that the club had my back.  With all that I took a deep breath and tried to shake my insecurities.

This was also my first club outing since Kelly and I resolved our differences and became friends.  And since the source of our prior discord had been Ron, I wanted to touch base with her and make sure we were on the same page.  I found her dressing for the evening in one of the sleeping rooms.  I approached her and asked her if she had plans with Ron and if so to just let me know and I will step aside.  I did not want to risk our fragile friendship running awry. She looked at me with an expression that told me she was saying the ‘expected’ as opposed to what she might really think.  I was a bit deflated when I realized that we were not really communicating.  I reminded her that I did not pick up on the social clues the last time things went afoul and that her explicitly telling me what she thought or wanted on the matter of Ron would go a long way to ensure that I do not miss the clues again tonight.  But, she had no intention of making it easy. 

In hindsight, I realized that Kelly may have been a little miffed at me.  We had talked about going out together to the other club the previous night.  But, when the opportunity arose, I was not eager to go together for purely selfish reasons.  I did not want to share Ron on our first night together after the long summer. I was very reluctant to explain to Kelly my motivation, but ultimately I did and hoped that she was not offended. It was certainly not very ‘lifestyle’ of me to not want to share, but I did not want to share.  And in the interest of being up front and honest, I said so.  My expressed desire to have one-on-one time with Ron managed to make its way back to Ron via the grapevine. I was uncomfortable that this personal tidbit of my desire was shared with Ron.  I did not want to be perceived as possessive, because I was not.  I was selfish in not wanting to share and perhaps even greedy.  So maybe Kelly’s response to my inquiry about her evening plans with Ron was more in reaction to her being annoyed with my prior behavior regarding our night out that did not come to fruition.

Before dinner I saw Bill talking with an attractive blond woman in her mid-50s.  I could see a familiar energy exchange between the two as they spoke.  And I knew that Bill had a ‘date’ tonight with Mona.  Mona was also Nick’s favorite playmate whom I had yet to meet.  So, I walked directly up to Bill and Mona and introduced myself to her.  She realized who I was fairly quickly and graciously thanked me for sharing my husband with her so freely.  She seemed like a nice enough woman, but I chose to keep my distance and space for the evening.  I wanted to allow Nick the freedom and comfort to continue to explore with Mona at will.  I did not want to provide him with anything from me – a comment or look – that could give him any kind of pause.  Mona was his choice and I respected that.  So I was friendly, polite and gave her wide berth without being rude (I hoped).

I watched the dinner dynamics at the table between Bill and Mona, Ron and Kelly, and Nora and myself.  Despite what Kelly had told me about having no plans to fuck Ron, she was being aggressively sexually suggestive with him. Whether she wanted to make a point or whether she wanted to fuck him I could not tell.  But I wanted to give her space, as well.  It had been difficult not being friends for many months, especially in terms of the deleterious effects it had on my close friendship with Bill, and I did not want to return to that depressing milieu.

When Kelly moved out onto the dance floor and up into the cage, I knew she would be occupied dancing for a while.  I took advantage of the moment.  I asked Ron if he thought this would be a good time for us to escape to the play space and fuck while Kelly was otherwise occupied.  He concurred and we headed upstairs. On the way we stopped in the sleeping room to change into bedroom attire (no street clothes allowed in the play area). I asked Ron what he thought of Mona.  I said that I had heard from a couple of sources that she was a lot of fun to play with and that maybe Ron might want to consider playing with her.  But, Ron very explicitly told me that he did not want to encroach on Bill’s date for the evening and that he wanted to be respectful of Bill.

It was early in the night and the play space was vacant with the exception of Sara and Jeffery, the monitors.  This lovely couple tends to play off the typical club evening sexual cycles in order to meet Jeffery’s official club responsibilities.  They were lightly touching and clearly moving toward something way more intimate and intense.  Ron and I smiled at them mischievously and headed around the corner to my favorite froggie chair (Ron prefers the froggie chair that is in the highly trafficked area nearest the top of the stairs…it tends to lead to more sex with other people for him and more possibilities of group involvement).

We played under the black lights on the beds adjacent to the froggie chair for a while.  We were kissing, tumbling, sucking, finger fucking and thoroughly enjoying ourselves. It did not take long before we were both ravenous more.  My body was ripe, ready and eager for his cock. We shifted up onto the froggie chair and he plunged his considerable cock deep into my insatiable cunt and I melted with pleasure.

As usual, Ron liberated my overly exuberant sexual exclamations.  My moans and cries escalated and reverberated throughout the play area causing a virtual clamor of pleasurable sound.  Soon our ecstatic symphony was matched by similar gratifying sounds from the opposite side of the play space.  Sara and Jeffery were matching our sexual calls with their own and between the four of us we had a veritable erotic orchestra sending erotic music out to all within hearing distance. It was an excellent first fuck of the night with Ron and a sexually satisfying way to start a promising evening.

We headed back downstairs and Ron was immediately whipped up into the dancing frenzy with the wanton whirlwind that was Kelly and a couple of other apparently unattached desirous women.  Almost instantly, the women who were dancing with Ron were taking turns sucking on Ron’s cock and he was loving it! I opted to head off in another direction for the evening since I was side-lined from dancing due to a knee injury. 

I found myself in the indoor hot tub chatting and relaxing with a couple and a single man that I had not encountered before.  He was not particularly talkative, but did eventually ask me rather directly if I wanted to go upstairs to play.  I answered, “maybe.” A totally uncool answer without a doubt!  But, I just was not sure, I had not even seen this man beyond his head…the rest of him was submerged.  He looked incredulous at my non-committal answer. After another couple of moments I moved over to sit with him to see if I could pick up a vibe or something that could help me decide if I wanted to play with him. Once sitting closer, I stretched my legs over his lap and he began to massage my feet and calves.  His touch held a lot of potential and I wanted to feel his hands roam across my body.  It made me wonder what else his energy had to share with me.

Needless to say, we decided to go upstairs to play.  At the top of the stairs I saw Ron at the froggie chair pounding away at a woman – though she did not look like one of the women I had seen him with on the dance floor….so I wondered what happened to that set of ladies.  But, clearly, erotic fun was well under motion and there was a group gathered around watching, touching and probably hoping to participate. I did not see Nora.

I also saw Bill and Mona engaged in some raucous sex in the open play area immediately to the right at the top of the stairs and just around the corner from Ron and his sexual frenzy.  Bill was pounding Mona hard. And he had a huge smile of his face that was radiating so brightly that it practically lit up that side of the play area.  He looked up and saw me entering the play space with the hot tub man, Calvin, and waved enthusiastically at me without missing a beat as he vigorously thrust in and out of Mona’s pussy. It was a pretty funny site all things considered.

Calvin and I selected a lower bed in the 60s neon flower child environs and started kissing which led very quickly to Calvin’s tongue and lips on my vulva and his fingers in my pussy. It was decidedly pleasant and felt increasingly good. I was beginning to respond with gentle writhing and moans.  Calvin took this as a positive sign. He had indeed started my orgasmic engines, but he had not revved them up to anywhere near top speed.  But it was enough for me to take mattes into my own hands.  He rolled over and leaned back with his condom-clad cock reaching for the ceiling. 

I climbed above his cock and wrapped my pussy around his shaft from top to bottom. He felt good inside and my cunt was already approaching a point where I just could not deny myself. So I rode his cock hard in brief spurts, feeling his rigid member push rhythmically up against my G-Spot until I began a series of explosive repeated climaxes.  I just kept riding him, causing his cock to move deliberately around inside my pussy allowing me to reach a point where I simply could not hold back.  I came over and over again on top of him.  He looked up at me with surprise and uttered, ‘oh, wow.’  I smiled devilishly and said, “you know I am just using you for my own pleasure here.”  He smiled and said, “ I am totally good with that.”  I laughed and climaxed a few more times before Calvin rolled me over on my back and fucked me hard for a few minutes before his condom-clad cock exploded inside my pussy. I could almost feel his ejaculation slamming up against my cervix.  I love to feel a man ejaculate inside my cunt. It makes me hot just thinking about the feeling as I write.  But, in the non-monogamy world, I never experience the erotic and sensual feel of the force of a man’s ejaculate inside me.  And I almost never feel it when he is condom-clad. So this was a rare delight.

Calvin and I really did not talk.  It was essentially an anonymous fuck.  I was not especially social on this night and I used him in the way that men so often use women.  And he was as good with it as I usually am when I am on the receiving end.  We parted saying that we might see each other later in the night. And yes, it would be fun to have another go.  Destiny did not see fit to cross our paths again this night, but I would enjoy fucking him again should the opportunity arise.

After freshening up, I went downstairs to rehydrate.  I checked out the dance floor and watched the remaining sexies out there dancing.  Some of the club patrons were a real treat to watch on the dance floor.  The women in particular could be overtly erotic….but I wondered if they played upstairs where the sexual is completely open or if they just stayed downstairs for the extended tease.  I have yet to determine what really happens with some those sexy writhing females bodies on the dance floor. Some I have never seen upstairs.

As I was watching, a man that called himself Ralph approached me.  It was very curious because he looked nothing like a Ralph and it was a bit tough for me to keep a straight face when he told me his name was Ralph (there is a long history with the name that I will spare you).  The juxtaposition between the name and the package was just extreme.  But, Ralph sounded like it could be a fun.

Ralph was new in the club scene and said he had come to the club with a female friend who was off playing somewhere.  He asked me if I would be interested in playing with him.  He was gung ho to jump in feet first and was looking for a willing and ready playmate.  I was not especially attracted to his physical self, but I found his frankness to be appealing and brave.  So, I decided to take him up for a spin to see what he could offer.  As we were walking though the play area, I heard Ron call out my name.  I looked into one of the large lower beds near the bathroom and froggie chair.  I was greeted with an interesting sight, but not quite the configuration that I had expected to see.  I saw Kelly who I thought would be fucking Ron, but there was someone in between Ron and Kelly.  Who that heck was that woman?  I had not the slightest idea who she was, but her face was deeply entrenched in Kelly’s pussy and Kelly looked as though her pussy receptive capacity was on the edge of being exceed by the exuberance of this clearly very bi-sexual woman.  Likewise at the other end, so to speak, I saw Ron’s cock fucking this woman enthusiastically from behind.  Ron was smiling from ear to ear and Kelly was equally as thrilled…well sort of. I was free to join, but did not. In hindsight, I had had many opportunities to join in some very fun sexy action with Ron or others through out the evening, and I probably should have jumped at the chance.

Ralph selected an upper bed with a broad view of two areas of the play space.  I understood the appeal, but at this time of the evening, the upper areas can get down right hot!  And sure enough, it was sweltering up there.  But, what the heck, that is what showers are for.  So we headed up the ladder. 

Ralph wanted to touch my body and massage me.  He traipsed his fingertips lightly over my entire body.  It was a somewhat pleasant feel but it was not sexually arousing per se.  Honestly it was more likely to put me to sleep that get me off.  Just as I was considering mixing it up, he settled upon my pussy for what turned out to be a most unusual experience.  Ralph began to gently pinch my vulva.  He methodically went up and down my inner and outer labia careful to include every nook and cranny.  He gently pinched every little bit of me.  I was getting very mildly aroused by the odd sensations, but it was not making me want to fuck him (or anyone).  I was beginning to writhe slightly and moan ever so gently.  He, however, was getting unbelievably rock hard.  His perception of my pleasure was phenomenally exciting for him.  He explicitly said that my getting so excited was an incredible turn on for him. 

Okay, for anyone who reads my blog, you will know that the above paragraph did not indicate at all that I was salivating with desire.  It was all I could do not to laugh when I thought of the difference between my reaction (and his interpretation of it) to his touch and my true sexual orgasmic capacity.  I knew then that he really was knew to the club, because while I don’t know that many people, it is not exactly a secret that I am multi-orgasmic and down right loud when the sex is phenomenal.

Anyway, I was glad Ralph was pleased with himself and decide to let him enjoy his sexual foray.  I gleefully wrote it all off as an anthropological experience for myself!  Ok, not so nice, but I did not have the heart to tell him what I was really thinking nor did I have the desire to hang in there and guide him to meet my needs.  So with his excited rigid cock condom clad, he rammed himself into my pussy for a minute or so and we were done.  One take away from this encounter was that I really should insist on lube.  Often, like in this encounter, men do not think that need to use lube.  I can assure you, it is always better with proper lubricant!!

After a quick shower, I found Ron, Bill and Mona all downstairs near the dance floor.  I touched Ron’s back and he felt hot and sticky.  I wondered if the erotic moist heat emanating from his back was from recent dancing or residual sexual exuberance.  I was predisposed to assume the later.  I was not inclined to hang around the dance floor and Mona.  I was not in the mood to be politely social and knew that she might want to connect since she was my husband’s regular fuck buddy.  I figured making myself scarce was a better approach and it allowed me to avoid being misinterpreted…a common occurrence.

Nora appeared from somewhere like magic.  I asked her to accompany me to the yurt out behind the club.  It was literally a yurt, which these days was being used as separate space to explore alternative erotic play.  The sexy activities in the yurt were BDSMesque, with flogging on a St. Andrew’s cross, fire play and a violet wand for electrical stimulation.   I was interested in trying the fire play.  Nora had tried it earlier this year and enjoyed it a lot.   Unfortunately, someone was already engaged in fire play so it was not to be.  Instead Nora and I watched an amazingly erotic scene with Alan sending electric charges through his fingertips all over the body of a sexy physically enticing man.  He was completely nude, resting back on a table.  Alan was traipsing his fingers over his body with special attention to his breasts and nipples.  It was an intensely erotic experience for him, which increased to epic proportions when Alan’s touch moved to his cock and balls.  He loved it. He was beside himself with explicit expression of undeniable pleasure that bordered on the edge of pain.  This man was writhing on the bed at Alan’s touch and crying out with exuberance while teetering on the pain/pleasure threshold.  It was undoubtedly one of the most erotic visual and aural scenes I have ever been granted the opportunity to witness.  It was a pivotal moment for me to experience by proximity the magnitude of erotic energy that lingering on the brink of pain could deliver.  And a man writhing at the hands of another man while his female partner looked on was fabulously seductive.

After the BDSM yurt, I headed back up to the hot tub to just relax and avoid people dynamics.  I was not up for anything heavy tonight and did not want to engage anyone about anything that was even remotely serious and was content to keep somewhat to myself.  As I was slowly melting into the hot tub, I noticed Ron walk past the window with Mona trailing him.  Now, I thought that was a very interesting turn of events.  I wondered how it had come to pass that the two of them were heading up into the play area together.  Just a few hours earlier, Ron told me that he would not pursue Mona because of his respect for Bill.  It was a bit curious for me, but I did not dwell on it much as I really did not care that much about what action led to what movement.  I thought hooray for Ron, because it was clear that he got an undeniable high out of fucking new women….fucking new women was like a source of adrenalin for Ron in the same way that being fucked by a number of men in a Gang Bang scenario sends me soaring to ecstatic heights.

While Mona and Ron were fucking away upstairs, I went trolling around the club with no real goal or intent.  What I found was totally out of character for the club and really set me on edge.  At the door to the sleeping room I encountered a couple.  He was sitting on a chair and visibly upset; she was on her knees looking compunctious and crying.  They were conversing in whispers, but the gravity of the exchange was clear even from a distance. 

I needed to find another space to occupy that did not have this heavy emotional vibe saturating the air.  I found Denise sitting alone in a single chair placed on the dance floor watching a few remaining sexy ladies slithering around each other and entwining themselves in the bars of the elevated cage in a steamy and sensuous fashion. It is always a delight to watch the sexy bi-tending ladies dance together.  I joined Denise and enjoyed the erotic display for a while. And then Denise and I were distracted by what appeared to be an aggressive argument between a woman and a man wearing a heavy chain collar – the same man that I had passed ten minutes earlier on slamming his cock doggy style into a woman in the downstairs conversation pit nearest the play area.  He was fucking her ruthlessly when I passed.  He had a tight grip on her hair, pulling her head and neck back as he pummeled her pussy with almost violent disregard.   She was not going anywhere until he fucked her to his satisfaction. I had been a bit taken aback by his demeanor and the intensity of the sexual exchange at the time. It was edgier sex than I typically witnessed in the club.

Near the dance floor we hear a loud, hard, resounding slap. Denise and I were now completely distracted by the ensuing argument that we witnessed.  We discussed between us whether the aggressive and very non-club like behavior was part of their own play style or whether there was actually a serious violent tending incident playing out before our eyes.  It was a 50-50 call.  But, even if it was part of their play repertoire, it was decidedly out of the comfort zone of expected club conduct. Denise left to discuss the confrontation with Phil, one of the club managers.

Shaking off the residue of confrontation, I headed upstairs into the sleeping room only to discover the earlier couple at one end of the sleeping area cuddled and crying together…not in a loving intimate way but rather in a painful hurt kind of way.  Argh! That energy was a major downer and not one in which I wished to share physical space.

Seeking only happy, sensual energy, I headed back up into play spaces.  I was trolling around with half a mind to play and half a mind to sleep – though the sleeping room was contaminated with negative energy and the play area was still a cacophony of moans and cries of ecstasy. I rounded the corner and stopped in my tracks. I saw Ron and Mona entwined in an intimate, affectionate cuddle, which I recognized immediately.  I knew they had been playing for hours so the sex must have been great (and I had certainly heard plenty from both Nick and Bill that Mona was a blast in the sack), but I had not suspected that there would be a bond.  Ron comes and goes and fucks a wide range of women.  And I really had never cared in the least.

But, seeing Ron and Mona enmeshed with such intimacy, shockingly caused me pain. It hurt because I realized that the special place that I had held in his eye was diminished.  I had been feeling this moment coming for some months as the newness of our time together withered and Ron’s touch gradually lost its urgency.  Do not get me wrong, Ron and I are magnetically attracted to each other and that continues with its own sense of greedy desire.  But, to lose the status of the shiny new playmate was painful.

I was stunned by my reaction. It was entirely unexpected. I had no idea that I had emotions twisted up in what I had considered a fantastic sexual friendship.  We were always mutually desirous and our sexual ardor remained intense.  But, when did I become somehow bonded to Ron in a way that would permit me to have such a strong emotional reaction to seeing him and Mona cuddled intimately together. I was overwhelmed, bewildered and astonished by my reaction, which I deemed to be entirely out of bounds and inappropriate.  I had been preparing for weeks to encounter Nick and Mona together and was somewhat emotionally steeled for that event.  I had also know for months that Mona was a favorite of Bill as well…with whom I had developed a deep friendship – with occasional benefits – over the last year, a relationship I valued highly.

In the beginning, it was all about sex.  But, somewhere along the line select playmates became friends.  When and how it happened, I do not know.  I do think that I was probably the only one who did not realize that I was developing attachments.  In the beginning, Nick and I talked about attachment and polyamory.  At the time I insisted that I was only interested in the encounters for the sake of sex.  And the pure sexual component remains paramount for me.  But, Nick said that he liked personal connections and thought he many be more inclined toward poly relationships.  During the early days of our non-monogamy foray, I did not really see myself connecting emotionally at all in any significant way, never mind anything even approaching poly. I still don’t really see the poly world as a place the adequately addresses my newfound emotional connections.

Astonished by my visceral reaction to seeing Ron and Mona embracing and fondling in such an intimate way, I left the play area and returned to the sleeping area.  I laid down next to Nora who was already there trying to sleep.  She looked at me and asked what was wrong, so it must have been written plainly on my face.  My expression pretty much tells all…even when I do not want it to. I told her that Ron had “found his new favorite play toy” and she said, “You mean his penis?”  I said, “No, where he puts his penis.” “Ahhhhh,” and she understood immediately what I meant.  Ron and Nora had been in the lifestyle for many, many years and I was certain that this was something with which Nora was well experienced.  I wondered how it made her feel that I was having difficulty with Ron’s enthusiasm for a new woman.  How ironic and misplaced my reactions must have seemed to her.  Ron is her husband, after all. 

I drifted off to sleep as I struggled internally with my thoughts and emotions.  I was phenomenally hurt at the realization that I was no longer Ron’s shiny new penny and that he may have found his new obsession.  I had not realized how much I had enjoyed holding a special place in his sphere (and I wondered how much that might bother Nora).  I was devastated to realize that I did not know my own feelings and emotions.  I had been a master at denial for this to hit me so hard. And I was very angry with myself that I reacted the way I did.  I felt a tumultuous storm churning inside which violently questioned my motivation and the core of my being.  I was so distraught with my own reaction that I was literally nauseous.

I finally found myself in a rocky, light slumber but was unable to settle deeply into sleep because I was cold.  I debated getting up and going to sleep in the play area where it was warmer, but could not find the motivation to move.  Eventually Ron entered the sleeping room, woke Nora and asked her to join him in the play area to sleep together.  He turned to me and my gaze once again must have been revealing.  The first thing out of his mouth was, “Are you mad at me?”  So he knew.  I was not mad at him at all, but I was seethingly furious with myself.  I did not want to join him in the sleeping area.  But, I was cold and agreed to go anyway.  Truthfully, if I had a vehicle that night I would have left the club.  My negative energy was no good for anyone and I needed to fight my own demons.

As I was departing the sleeping area, Kelly and Bill were entering and I felt an interesting energy waft over from them, something with a message for me. I could not interpret it, but it felt a bit like a warning.  I should have heeded my instincts and stayed.  But, instead I went with Nora and Ron to the play space to sleep as we so often have in the past.

It was a mistake for me to join Ron.  I did not know that Mona was an invited bedmate for the sleeping portion of the night as well.  I bristled more strongly than I ever would have anticipated.  I had zero desire to sleep with Mona – who was now firmly sexually (and emotionally?) entrenched with the three men that I care about.  Mona was Nick’s absolute favorite playmate. Bill very much enjoyed her company with some regularity and now Ron.  I was perplexed at how Mona could almost overnight be in every corner of my non-monogamy world.  And while I held nothing against her for her involvement with these men and I understood the nature of the non-monogamous world, I did not want to sleep with her.

My bristling was apparent to Ron.  I needed to leave the space for a while to try and find my equilibrium. I did not want to say anything I would regret and I most certainly did not want to communicate any of this to Mona, because she really had very little to do with it.  It was about me.  And it would have been very unfair for me to give her any other impression. 

Ron blocked my way out of the chosen sleep space.  I firmly told him that I was going to sit in the hot tub. I repeated myself probably three times.  Ron did not move but rather observed me with intention and an energy that I could not readily identify.  Whatever it was, I sensed that it would exceed my comfort zone exponentially and I hoped he would choose not to reveal it to me.  He watched me closely and seemed to be debating what action if any he should take given my obvious state of irritation.   Ron wisely moved aside just when I was about to burst with the need to escape the situation.

I sat in the hot tub for quite a sustained length of time.  I would have slept there if I did not think I would slide under the water and drown by accident.  I was trying to understand what the hell was going on inside my head.  I was trying to be rational and calm. Eventually, I talked myself back down into a zone of logic where I could see how irrational and inappropriate my responses were.  I returned to the sleeping space and curled up in my sheet and blanket about as far away from Ron, Mona and Nora as I could get and slept in fits and starts for the remainder of the night.

As the night transitioned into morning, Ron and I began to reach out toward each other seeking reconnection.  I wanted to feel him and gage my response to him following such a turbulent internal event.  He asked if I was okay.  I said I was not entirely okay.  He asked if I was angry with him.  I was not angry with him.  But, I was very angry with myself.  I asked him to join me in the hot tub so we could talk.

Once alone in the hot tub I explained to him my reaction to what I had witnessed between him and Mona the night before. I explained how it made me feel and how much it hurt to experience the end of the special place I held in his eye.  I tried to explain it with the analogy of ‘a shiny new penny.’  I had been his shiny new penny for many months – more months than I could have anticipated, truthfully.  But, that now he had found another woman with whom he found a similar connection.  She seemed to be the ‘shiny new penny.”  I think he understood what I was saying.  I expressed that I also felt my feelings to be both entirely inappropriate and out of bounds. Ron reaffirmed the value of our sexual friendship and his commitment to his marriage with Nora – which he was always adamant about and which I fully respected, just as he respected my marriage.

Ron and I reconnected sexually in the froggie chair with a resounding morning fuck.   Ironically, Sara and Jeffery were in the play area again.  The four of us shared our boisterous expression of exuberant sexual pleasure with each other as the night came to a close and daylight streamed through the windows.  Not surprisingly, we roused the few remaining sexies and some of them also began their own carnal indulgence that led to a virtual orchestra of sexual harmony.

Post-sex Ron and I returned to the hot tub and found Nora and Mona chatting.  I have no idea the direction of their conversation, but am sure it would have been fun to be a fly on the wall.  Nora pretty immediately rose to leave the hot tub.  I followed shortly thereafter; I did not wish to stay with Mona and Ron. And I knew that Ron would like to be alone with Mona, so I went to shower.  While I took one of the first club showers alone that I have had in many months, through the steamy windows I could see Ron glide through the bubbling water over to Mona and slip his fingers inside her pussy, her back arched with visible pleasure.

As I dressed, I told Nora exactly what I had told Ron.  I did not want her to think that I was encroaching on her husband in any way.  I wanted her to be fully informed. She said she understood, was not surprised and did not feel threatened by me in any way.  She also said that it was perfectly clear that Ron and I had a very unique connection.  She had seen that for many months.  It seems that I was the only one that was wearing blinders. Nick had said something quite similar months earlier.  It seemed I was an expert of denial.

I went downstairs to breakfast and found myself choosing a seat at a table with Bill, Mona and Ron and two other people.  There were three empty seats between the two men.  I knew that there was an intimate connection between us all.  Both Moan and I had both had shared both men as well as my husband.  I opted not to sit next to either man.  A bizarre choice, perhaps, but I just was not comfortable in the proximity of either Ron or Bill over breakfast, or Mona for that matter!  I needed my own space. I felt surrounded by an intricate web that I did not realize I had taken a part in weaving until this weekend.  How did I manage to let myself get so complicated?

Upon departing the club, I rode with Nora and Ron on the way back south to pick up my car.  It was a low energy time without a lot of talking. In hindsight, I am not sure that anyone really knew what to say.  I had gotten all weird the night before (and probably even this morning).  I was fairly despondent and I did not know what I thought about what had happened and had no idea what to say about any of it.  We stopped off for Mexican for lunch.  We sat in a booth that was opposite a booth full of children.  I sat next to Ron and Nora was opposite us.  As a result of the proximity of children, I found myself speaking softly so that we would not be overheard.  In retrospect that was a very poor choice. Later Nora lamented that for the first time she had felt like a third-wheel during that meal.  She could not hear the conversation and thought we/I was shutting her out.  I was shocked when she told this to me, but given the events of the night before and my sharing with both her and Ron separately in the morning, I cannot say that her reaction was out of line.  When I look back now, it does strike me as, perhaps, a sign of more than feeling like a third-wheel at a shared meal.

Later when I met up with Nick, he could sense my mood.  But, he was exhausted from his weekend camping trip.  I gauged our moods and felt like talking about what had happened should wait until the morning.  But, of course, Nick and his ever over active imagination began to spin a web of anxiety for himself.  By the time the next morning rolled around he was worried and had had little sleep. 

He joined me in the shower and I tried to explain to him what had happened and how it had made me feel.  It was very hard for me to share this with Nick, but again, I was promoting our policy of full disclosure.  I knew that Nick had thought I was more into Ron that I would admit for quite sometime.  And it turned out that he was correct.  It just took me a little longer than pretty much anyone else to figure it out for myself. 

I overestimated Nick’s capacity to be empathetic and understand that I was hurting.  I was hoping that he would be able to comfort me and just be present to bear witness to my experience and how it made me feel.  Instead I was sad when he said to me that he understood because Ron had been my ‘new shiny penny’ to the detriment of Nick’s special shine in my eye.  I was floored that my husband could for a minute assume that my open marriage friendship with Ron (and his wife) was in anyway a dimming of my own husband’s appeal.  I was stunned and saddened.  But then again, I suppose asking so much of my spouse even in an open marriage was being overly optimistic.  

August 23rd, Back in the Game

It has been 75 days since I was at an adult club. The abstention was partly by choice, influenced by busy summer schedules and accommodating delayed health care needs, but honestly it was largely a function of uncertainty on my part. My reaction to the events of late May was to hunker down and retreat.  I kept my head down and avoided much in the way of engagement on many fronts.  It really wasn’t until a couple weeks ago when I started to feel excited about the possibility of going out.  Nick had met a woman and had been frequenting the club with some regularity and I was FINALLY feeling like I wanted to go out, let loose, and return to my new normal me.

Nick took the children camping for the weekend so I was blessed to have two whole nights to relax, enjoy myself, reconnect with my sexual self and unleash the orgasmic beast within – the same one that had mostly been in hiding deep within the recesses of my mind for most of the summer.

I had a tranquil day unwinding as I meandered around slowly heading south to the evening’s activities, hitting the summer sales on the way and catching a flick at the local cinema.  I ended up watching a movie which I had mistakenly taken for an uplifting romance – though I had no idea until the movie started that it was a Woody Allen film….I must investigate better before choosing a film next time. Woody Allen irks me with his predictable rhythms and deliberate cadence.  And there is nothing uplifting about Woody Allen material.

As the evening turned into night, Ron and Nora arrived at our usual motel. My room was number 69 and sported a spacious king size bed.  How unbelievably appropriate! We had not seen each other since my last club outing – 75 days ago - so I was excited and yet oddly nervous to see them.  Nervous?  Yes, but I could not put my finger on why I was nervous. Maybe it was a function of my anticipation….or even an unexplained trepidation.  This night was a night of reuniting with sexual playmates and friends after a long break, getting back into the free wheeling sex club scene, rehabilitating my bruised psyche, and reestablishing the essential nature of my being in the titillating world of non-monogamy.

After warm and fuzzy hugs all the way around, our combustible desire ignited and Ron and I simply could not keep our hands off one another. We started kissing and touching, tentatively at first and then with more urgency.  His body was as enticing as ever; his erection visually and physically evident, bulging in his jeans.  Just the sight of his hard cock – even constrained by clothing – was a huge turn on for me resulting in fluttering in my groin as my wet pussy yearned for contact and my vulva began to pulse.  I wanted to fuck him straightaway. 

Nora and Ron both suggested that we forgo the club entirely and just stay in the motel.  After all, we were very eager to get straight to the intimate sexual part of our time together and really, what difference did it make where we fucked?  However, Nick and I had not yet reach consensus that staying in a motel with one’s lover (and his wife in my case) for a night of exquisite fucking, as opposed to a night of raucous public fucking in a swingers’ club with a potentially diverse group of partners (followed by a hotel stay), was acceptable. And this was exceptionally poignant in that just the previous weekend, Nick had done just that (another story that perhaps Nick will share on his blog) without prior consultation with me.  Unlike Nick, I choose to insist that we go out to the club as planned.  Both Nora and Ron were game but I definitely sensed that Ron would rather have stayed at the motel for a night of sexual reconnection. Honestly, I would rather have stayed in the motel and gotten down to business. Of course, we had the option of immediate sexual gratification in the motel – and we came close - and then going out….but if we did that I did not believe for a second we would ever actually leave the motel!

I slipped into my faux black leather dress and sexy new black heels and we were off.  I was enthusiastic and rearing to go for a relaxing sex-filled night – along with my self-inflicted residual reluctance, hesitancy and timidity that I desperately sought to expunge.  I urgently wanted to get back to the secure, confident, safe non-monogamous place that I had thoroughly enjoyed in the pre-Fabio and pre-aftermath world.

As soon as we arrived at the club, we discovered Kyle and Sabrina fucking away in one of the upstairs rooms with yet another couple that Ron and Nora had reportedly introduced into the Lifestyle a few months earlier. I had seen them many times at the club since I first encountered them in January.  And there had been mutual flirting and definite interest every time. I liked the way Kyle’s eyes roam across my body when we meet.  But darn if our schedules just did not seem to line up! They arrive early, fuck early and leave early - always as far as I can tell.  We continuously seem to discover them enthusiastically embroiled in a sexy full swap scenario or just finishing up!  This time both Nora and I had drinks in our hands and we were loath to put them down after what had happened to Kelly the previous month. (Side note: Kelly was at the same club and someone slipped something into her drink. By her own account, she became an insanely sexual animal and fucked like crazy for a period of time before becoming nearly incapacitated.)

After saying hello to Kyle and Sabrina we wandered through the upstairs.  Ron and I were more than ready to go find a place to play.  The fishbowl was enticingly vacant and an absolute favorite for my exhibitionist tendencies, but Ron suggested that we find a room where we could be alone.  I had really been looking forward to one on one time with Ron and I imagine since he knew this that he was trying to accommodate my desires.  Because honestly, I find it to be a little out of his character to turn down a play space that opens the door (and window) to a broader sexual party as the fishbowl so aptly does and allows for considerable exhibitionist satisfaction.  I would have been fine either way.  I just could not wait to feel Ron’s amazing cock deep within my body and his magical fingers in my cunt bringing me absolutely blissful G-Spot orgasms. I desperately wanted Ron to fuck me royally, long and hard, until I could come no more….though, truthfully, I have yet to find that orgasmic limit.  Maybe there is no limit to my orgasmic potential!! Ok, maybe that is waaaay overly optimistic, but so far, I have not found myself unable to reach that phenomenal orgasmic state at the end of a busy fucking night, rather I seem to just want to climax more, which is part of why I just love this Lifestyle and the club environment.  It is also probably why I enjoy Gang Bangs so, so much.

Ron and I chose the first room on the left in the backside of the club on the first floor, just off the dining area.  We did not draw the curtain so voyeuristic diners had the option of enjoying our sexual display while they ate.  Ron’s magic fingers brought me to unparalleled G-Spot orgasms almost instantly.  We were a tumble of passionate kissing, grasping and touching, enthusiastic licking, ravenous sucking and thoroughly delighting in each other’s bodies and erotic attentions and intentions.  It had been a long time since we had merged sexually and I was famished for Ron’s particular energies and sexual prowess.  Every man delights me in different ways – some far more intensely than others – but Ron consistently pleasures me in unbelievably addictive ways.  I always want more.

When we decided to come up for air and find Nora, we were drenched and definitely needed a shower.  The showers were not far from our play space, just a short walk through the dining area. Club rules dictate that women must always wear shoes so I slipped on my sexy new black heels endowed with metal decorations that matched the leather choker I was wearing.  I checked my physical insecurities and self-consciousness and took a deep breath.  Dressed only in a black leather-studded choker and heels, I picked up my dress and walked through the dining area toward the shower.  Another first, I had never before found the cojoñes to walk through this club in the nude before – never mind the dining area!  But, my life has been full of firsts – sexual and otherwise – this last year. With each first, I find a new lightness of being.

I did not make it to the shower as nearly quickly as I had anticipated.  Kyle and Sabrina were directly in my  path talking with Nora and others and preparing to depart the club.  They stopped me with an overly appreciative visual appraisal of my current state – nude, in heels and very obviously freshly and thoroughly fucked!  Kyle and Sabrina asked me again to get in touch with them, as they were eager to play as well.  (Note to self: I have got to find their card and contact information!)  Kyle gave me a little hug and lightly tongue-endowed kiss as a good-bye.  I gazed at his playful eyes, smiled a broad devilish smile while standing there completely nude in front of him.  My more suggestive stance led to a more intimate, deep, tantalizingly suggestive kiss.  The sparkle in Kyle’s eye and that last kiss held some very naughty, enticing promise.  I would have to work harder to meet up with them to play sometime soon.

After a warm, slippery, soapy shower, Ron and I emerged dripping to discover an attractive twenty-something young woman busily primping in the mirror.  She looked at us with and awed expression and said, “Wow, you two are glowing!” She continued on with a series of statements about how obvious it was that Ron and I enjoyed each other sexually and how we radiated with desire and palpable pheromones.  I was a bit taken aback by her unusual forwardness and I could not decide if she was hitting on us as a sexual pair, on Ron or just being friendly.  Her conversation traversed into provocative territory, an exchange in which one does not often travel in a sex club without premeditated mischievous intent.  However, her body language and general vibes did not seem to support the necessary physical intent, despite the conversational prelude, that would be necessary to take it to another level.  She did say something to the effect of ‘who do I have to blow to get a vodka martini?’ So, I am sure that you can guess who then produced a vodka martini!  Unfortunately Ron did not get the hoped for blow job….from her, that is.

Shortly thereafter, we rounded the corner and saw Madeline and her partner, Ben, whom I had not met previously.  Mary was vivacious and fun to be around as always.  The four of us went in search of Nora so we could all play together but Nora had disappeared into a back room and all the doors were closed.  Another Club rule – never open a closed door in a play space.  We knew Nora was back there behind a closed door and we could hear her sexual exclamations but we could not for the life of us identify which door she was behind!  Eventually we gave up and went upstairs in hopes that the fishbowl was available for play. 

And it was!  Mary and Ben began playing and Ron and I picked up where we had left off.  Before we knew it Nora climbed through the window and joined the pile of writhing bodies.  I enjoyed listening as Mary and Nora were pleasured.  I liked touching Mary as the men in the room pleasured her orally and digitally.  Her sounds of obvious pleasure were contagious.

 While we were on the fishbowl, I realized there was a man standing a respectful distance from the door watching Ron and I.  I wondered if he wanted to join the fun, but he gave no signal other than intent, stone-faced observation.  Not a smile or a glint in his eye – nothing at all to indicate that he was eager and enthusiastic.  Interestingly, I watched this man watching Ron and I the entire night. Ron noticed him as well.  He was always just a few feet away watching us.  Possibly longing to play but unsure how to engage?  If he had asked I would have welcomed him warmly and fucked him eagerly, but something held me back from initiating.  Despite the great sex of the evening, I was feeling reserved and inhibited – more so than my normal self, perhaps even less enthusiastic.   I am sure that Ron could feel it.  It permeated me and I was working hard to move through it.

Toward the end of the fishbowl extravaganza I leaned over and kissed Mary. Even though I am still somewhat on the fence in terms of my sexual interest in women, I do enjoy kissing women, especially when they are being fucked.  I also like caressing women’s breasts and every so often I delight in sucking and nibbling on gorgeous erect nipples. Beyond that the jury is still out. 

Midnight snack time rolled around and Ron, Nora, Madeline and Ben headed to the buffet for sustenance.  Unfortunately, after a night of fucking, food did NOT appeal to me in the slightest.  I tried to hang out with them and be social while they were eating, but I just could not stomach the sight and smell of food and I really did not want to sit down…I needed to keep moving.  So instead, I went trolling upstairs. The attention and interest I garnered from men when I was on my own was truly remarkable on this particular evening.  However, by this point in the night the consumption of alcohol limited my options of would be suitors.  When a man flirtatiously approached me and ask me to play and a waft of strong alcohol smacked me directly in the face, I could only respond in the negative.  The thing is, if they had not been drinking enough to whack me in the face with fumes, I would probably have said yes.  Because, I would have enjoyed fucking more men and exploring more because every man’s sexual style and physical attributes are decidedly different and I had no real way to judge the magnitude of pleasure a man could bring me without actually doing the needful and fucking him.  Feeling the magnetic quality of his energy (or lack thereof) though pre-coitus touching can be helpful but was still not an accurate way to predict potential sexual gratification.  Since the beginning of my journey in non-monogamy, I had managed to fuck some men that I wish I had weeded out before the actual act.  But, I had also had some earth shattering encounters with men that on first blush I would not have wanted to fuck.  So really, I should just fuck whenever the opportunity presents and enjoy all the experiences for what they are. And that thought has me tingling.

After the midnight snack, everyone ended up upstairs scoping for more sexual opportunities.  The same ever watchful man stood near Ron and I studying us again; and again, not even a smile or spark of interest emanated from his eyes.  Nora was leaning against the balcony watching the sexy couples on the dance floor below.  I observed an remarkably sexy, attractive black man approach and ask Nora if she would like to play.  At first she did not hear him and he had to repeat his request. And then she turned him down!  I know that it can be incredibly hard for a man to get up the nerve to ask a woman for sexy play in the first place, but then to have to repeat the offer and then get rejected, well, that has to be hard on the ego for some men.  I should have been smart and grabbed him as he walked by, but was still stunned that Nora turned him down.  It is ironic because I have seen Nora turn down attractive men like this a number of times, yet on occasion she laments that men do not find her attractive and are not interested in her sexually.  And that is just not true.    

Ron and I were both sensing a dearth of potential play partners so he suggested we indulge our insatiable selves on the nearby black leather sofas, which looked onto the dancing pole.  I had played there with Ron once before but I had never full on fucked on the sofas.  It tended to be out of my comfort zone, which is an incredibly bizarre thing to say given what seems to fall inside my comfort zone these days!

Our sexy sofa time started with a plush white cotton towel placed under my bare backside to protect the sofa from the drippy wetness that I was likely to produce. I remember sitting on the edge of the sofa taking Ron’s already stiff cock in my mouth and licking and sucking him.  I had only just started when he told me to lean back so that he could taste me.  I leaned back into the sumptuous sofa.  Ron was quickly on his knees with his face immersed between my legs enthusiastically eating my pussy.  I could do nothing but lean way back and enjoy the erotic sensations and observe the remaining club patrons watching our sexual encounter.  Leaning back on a sofa, fully exposed was an oddly vulnerable position from which to be regarded by total strangers. But, not surprisingly, I enjoyed being watched.

Ron emerged from my nether region and plunged his condom-clad cock deep into me.  The deep satisfaction that I experienced when he entered me caused me to emit a deep guttural moan that was masked by the almost deafening music that despite the late hour still reverberated throughout the club.  But my euphoric pleasure was perceptibly evident on my face and through my full-body physical response to being fucked by Ron.   Our voyeurs were getting their monies worth.

Afterwards I went to the ladies loo and left Ron sitting on the sofa watching a woman pole dance for her partner directly in front of Ron.  When I returned I did not join Ron on the sofa but rather watched him and the sexy pole-dancing lady from some distance.  Ron told me that it made him feel a bit odd to be left on the sofa alone and as a single man sitting and watching this woman pole dance.  I found that revelation to be somewhat amusing from a man that seems to have few limits and few discomforts in the sexual realm.

Back at the motel I had a real first.  Sleep!  I actually slept solidly for several hours, which is simply unheard of for me.  Wild and sexy nights at a club are usually followed with excellent motel sex that leaves me utterly exhausted.  However, on this particular sex filled night we deferred our motel romp and dropped of immediately into a heavy sleep.  On most nights my body literally vibrates through and through for hours and hours at such an intense frequency that it is utterly impossible for me to do anything but doze lightly.  So this night with some real sleep was an incredible treat and allowed for me to feel unusually revived and refreshed in the morning.

Ron and I enthusiastically made up for our sex-free motel night in the morning with intense, raucous, raw sex.  What a delightfully exhilarating way to start the day.  Freshly and thoroughly fucked with a whole other night of play in front of me!  Happy times!

As we were leaving the motel I noticed a man curiously watching me stow my bags in my car. I realized that he occupied the motel room next to ours and must have heard our resounding morning romp.  And then, I observed him watching Nora and Ron as they loaded their belongings into their vehicle. And then I saw the realization strike him as he put two and two together and grasped the fact that Ron, Nora and I were all coming out of the same motel room…the very same motel room that had caused a dim of sexual report to reverberate throughout the second story of the motel just a short while before.  The motel was full and he had been in the room next to ours so there was absolutely no way he could have missed our sexcapades earlier in the morning.  I was undeniably vocal which I tend to be when the sex is out of this world!

While standing in the parking lot, I commented to Nora and Ron that this man was watching us and I wondered what he was thinking.  Nora said something to the effect of ‘well, if he asks we will just say we are poly.’ And that comment left me dumbfounded.  I did not know how it was meant or if it was a joke, and I did not ask.  But just hearing the word ‘poly’ really stunned me.

After a scrumptious brunch Nora suggested that Ron ride with me as we head north for another night at another club.  Nora said that she thought that Ron and I needed some time alone.  I was pretty surprised and wondered a bit if she wanted alone time herself.  But, the drive with Ron was fun and went by amazingly quick.  We had never really had a time to sit and just talk between the two of us.  We talked about all manner of things but the focus was sexual and about his lifestyle experiences.  I did take the opportunity to ask Ron for more details about his safe sex practices.  I very specifically asked him with whom he was fluid-bonded. I inquired because he is someone with whom I would love to have bareback sex.  But truthfully, I doubt bare backing is in the cards.  Ron was not particularly forthcoming with information.  It was such a missed opportunity to really discuss a serious topic.  And my analytical and critical thinking skills are just too sharp not to be able to extrapolate the wide sexual network to which I am potentially exposed through just my play with Ron and his partners, and their partners, and their partners’ partners, etc.  It is not a matter of Ron’s word, but the word and actions of an extensive line of play partners, most of whom are entirely unknown to me.

We met up with Kelly and Bill at their house at the half waypoint between clubs.  We swapped cars and continued our journey north.  I had another rare treat.  I got to ride with Bill. While I consider Bill a close friend by virtue of our extensive on-line communications, I had rarely had the opportunity to be alone with him in real life.  It was really a lot of fun chatting the entire way up.  But, oddly, despite ‘knowing’ each other so well, I still felt awkward and could not bring myself to reach out and touch Bill without asking permission.  I think he thought that was a bit crazy of me!  Anyway, it was a great drive up both with Ron and then Bill.  It was so much fun just getting to chat freely about anything and everything.  What a nice way to start a new sexy evening.